In an effort to soften criticism over rising beach parking fees, Indian Rocks Beach officials this week unveiled an alternative option for residents: perform community service cleaning the beach in exchange for complimentary parking.

Within minutes of the announcement, residents collectively decided they would rather just pay.

The proposal, pitched as a “win-win for civic pride and coastal stewardship,” would allow locals to earn a digital parking pass by participating in organized litter pickups and dune maintenance. Officials described it as “a meaningful opportunity to connect with the shoreline.”

Residents described it as “a chore.”

“I love the beach,” said one IRB resident while tapping the parking app. “I just don’t love it in a reflective-vest capacity.”

Under the program, volunteers must register through the city’s Coastal Engagement Portal, complete a liability waiver, watch a 17-minute sand safety orientation video, and check in at a designated QR code station before receiving parking validation that expires precisely at 9:12 a.m.

City officials stressed the process is “simple and user-friendly.”

“It’s just three logins,” said one staff member. “Four if you forget your password.”

While the program was designed to foster civic pride, participation numbers were reportedly modest. Most residents opted for the $18 fee after conducting a “realistic Saturday morning analysis.”

“I support clean beaches,” said one beachgoer. “I just prefer supporting them financially.”

Officials admitted they may have overestimated the public’s appetite for “structured volunteerism before coffee.”

“We thought people would jump at the chance,” one commissioner said. “We did not anticipate how highly residents value convenience.”

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